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So chill out, other people have a right to their views too. What he was referring to was when someone goes OUT OF THEIR WAY to put that phrase, ‘my kids come first’, in a profile or write it during a conversation (how does that even come up in conversation???) there are HUGE issues there and the person reading it should run for dear life. So there was no need for you to “counter” with “why I would put my child over a man” because he wasn’t arguing that point - you veered off into a completely different direction with your rant.So improve your chance of success by keeping an eye out for the following red flags as you sort through potential date’s profiles: Photos: Photos can tell you a lot about a potential date.No photo, or a grainy, out-of-focus or outdated photo, are a sign that the person probably has something to hide, or else is not really serious about the dating process.Like I said before, kids grow up and live their own lives.Your mate is the one who will grow old with you (hopefully) and spend the rest of his life with you.But Vondie Lozano, licensed marriage and family therapist, has some other not-so-obvious flags to add to the list.

If the person is single, what else would they put in their photos, but their dog, etc? So, I don’t even read profiles that say, “..children will always come first.” I think kids are really cool, but I don’t need to be in a relationship where I will always com second. This is by far not the only one, but it is the easiest to explain.

You’re definitely projecting…which kinda proves MIKW’s point… Matter of fact, the only time it wouldn’t be a red flag is if it was said by some misguided man who thought women would be super duper impressed he wrote it so he could show everyone just how much he loves his kids—which is, again something we hope would be the case, lol.

Of course it goes without saying that kids come first. Actually, a man trying to impress women with something that should come naturally is a whole ‘nother kinda red flag… What he was referring to was when someone goes OUT OF THEIR WAY to put that phrase, ‘my kids come first’, in a profile or write it during a conversation (how does that even come up in conversation???

And I have never heard anyone give themselves such pious, sanctimonious airs about motherhood who is anywhere near the precious, loving little saint of a mommy they’re so desperately trying to convince people they are.

Genuinely good, selfless mothers don’t talk the way you do. There are predators who do specifically target unwed mothers for especial attention because they’re looking to find someone who is emotionally vulnerable so that she’s so pre-occupied that they have easy access to kids to do what they really want to do to kids. Single moms do not need extra drama in their lives and if the man is bringing the drama and forcing her to decide “it’s either me or the kids” then she is right to deep six that guy!

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